50 Ways to Leave Your Neuroses
by
Jimmy Walter

[Parody: 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover – P Simon]

 

The problem is all inside your head Al said to me,

The answer is easy if you take it logically

I’d like to help you in your struggle to be free,

There must be fifty ways to leave your neuroses.

Al said it really is my habit to dispute

Furthermore I hope my sarcasm will be elegantly construed

And I’ll repeat myself and I surely will be crude,

There must be fifty ways to leave your neuroses.

 

Chorus

You just take a new view, Drew

Let go of your blame, Jane

Just give up on your grief, Keith

And get your mind free.

Oh you hop on my stage, Paige

We need to dispuuute’ much

Just drop off your fear, dear

And get your Life free.

 

Al said it amuses me so to see you in such pain

I know there’s something I can do to make you smile again

I said I’d appreciate that and would you please explain

About the fifty ways

Al said why don’t we both just dispute on it tonight

And I believe that in the morning you’ll begin to see the light

Then Al made fun of me and I realized he certainly was right

There must be fifty ways to leave your neuroses.

 

Chorus